. . . Cause What You Did Was LOW . . .

LOL this is a post I started a while ago, and has been sitting in my Posts thing ever since! I forgot that it was only a draft ... so, since in the future I think it would be nice for y'all to understand what I'm talking about, I figured I'd put this post in to explain me and Lindsay's steadily arising problem ...

**~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~**


OMG I haven't blogged in FOREVER! I just realized that while I was working on a new chapter for my other blog-book.



SO MUCH has happened! For one thing, I guess I should start out by explaining the title of this entry . . .



Some of you might recognize it as lyrics to Kelly Clarkson's song "Low". About a week ago (lol now about a month ago), that was my theme song, and here is why . . .



I recieved an email from Lindsay, which included a "story". She asked me for advice for this girl who had apparently called her the night before. Now, one thing that you must know about Linds is that whenever she is talking about a friend at school who is having problems, she says their name. Instead, she chose to use nicknames, saying this . . . (btw these are her EXACT words . . . see if the story sounds familiar in any way . . .)



"fake names: and the story kind of "stretched"
Betty was walking along the street when like this dude she didn't know came up beside her. at first she was scared he was like a stalker or something, but then got to know him, and he was cool. they talk like all the time and see each other too. but then this other girl, cathy saw him and just wanted a friend. but they grew closer too. it turns out cathy and betty are pretty good friends, right.. cathy would be okay if betty dated the dude, but doesn't know how betty would feel if cathy dated him. betty did see him first. cathy tries to tell the dude to take betty, but he doesn't know.
what does cathy do. ignore the dude. until he is bac with betty?"



Sounding familiar yet? Re-read it if you have to . . .



Mmkay, here's the solution to this puzzle . . . (you can tell that I've been playing Nancy Drew and Professor Layton lately, can't you? :D)



Alright, let's start with the fact that the story is "stretched". Stretched = it strays a bit from the actual happenings, right?



Code names = uh, why would she use code names if I already know the names of all of her friends?!?!



Let's break this down, shall we?



"Betty was walking along the street when like this dude she didn't know came up beside her." = So, Betty is going on with her life, and all of a sudden this guy pops up out of ABSOLUTELY NO WHERE and tells her something improtant . . . like say, how he feels about her???



"at first she was scared that he was like a stalker or something," = Hmm, that's a pretty funny coincidence . . . I used to refer to Jeremy as "My Stalker" to her when we would talk about him . . . "but then got to know him, and he was cool." = So, Betty began to like him back, hmm??



"they talk all the time and see each other too." = Hey, that's funny, cause you know who I talk to all the time, and now comes to Sunday Night Bible Study with me?? Hmm . . .



"but then this other girl, cathy saw him and just wanted a friend. but they grew closer too." = That's supah wierd that she sends me this email RIGHT after she and Jeremy stay up until 3 in the morning texting . . . wow, they must have had a LOT to talk about . . . hmm . . . so what happens when you begin to talk more and more with someone??



"it turns out cathy and betty are pretty good friends, right.. cathy would be okay if betty dated the dude, but doesn't know how betty would feel if cathy dated him." = So, Betty and Cathy are like BFF . . . and Cathy KNOWS that Betty likes Je- I mean, "the dude", but now Cathy's pretty much putting her feelings for "the dude" before her BFFness with Betty . . . interesting how that happens . . . and I don't know about you, but I think that if I was Betty, I'd be pretty mad if Cathy dated "the dude" who she KNOWS Betty now likes . . .



"betty did see him first." = Uh, le-DUH Cathy . . . Betty saw him first like, I dunno . . . A YEAR AGO!



"cathy tries to tell the dude to take betty, but he doesn't know.
what does cathy do. ignore the dude. until he is bac with betty?" = Ya know, I think that it's hysterical that Cathy has all these problems with feelings on the same night that The Dude tells Betty that he thinks Cathy is purdy . . .



WHAT LINDS IS TRYING TO SAY IS . . . .



So Jeremy decides that he likes you (me), and now you guys hang out, IM, email, the whole nine yards. And NOW, he works at the same place that you want to work, AND on top of that, he is now coming to Sunday Night Bible Study with you. So then along comes me, thinking "oo I'll make a new friend!", but then I take something that Jeremy says and run totally astray with it, thinking that he likes me, and that we're going to date. But since your my friend, I suppose that I should make up a story and put code names instead of just coming out and telling you the truth, cause that's the way I roll. And oh, by the way, no matter what, I still want to date the guy that you JUST told me recently that you're starting to have feelings for . . . that's, like, OKAY with you, right?



AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!



Mmkay, so that all became clear to me the night after she sent the email. We were having an IM convo, and all of a sudden, she said something (can't remember what exactly it was), and it HIT ME like a bag of bricks. I re-read the email, and, thinking that Jeremy and my best friend were two-timing me behind my back, got VERY VERY VERY upset.

My mom and Renee sat down and talked with me. I had known all along that Linds would go after Jeremy; that's the way that she is. When she likes a guy, and he is either A: dating one of her friends, or B: interested in one of her friends insetad of her, she makes her friend choose between either her or him. And then by the time her friend turns the guy off or down or whatever, she's already found someone else to be infactuated with.

I couldn't believe it. I really couldn't. And the truth was that I wasn't so sure if Jeremy wasn't the one behind it all, and that broke my heart two-fold.

So as soon as we got home (we went to get ice cream!! ;), I called Jeremy, and we sorted it all out.

It turns out that they had been joking around, and somewhere in between the time when they got home from church that night to the time that they were joking around, Lindsay had decided that she liked Jeremy, and that she was going to date him no matter what I said. And when they were joking around, they were naming random people to be matched up with other random people, and Lindsay suggested them. Jeremy thought that she was kidding, and decided to laugh along with everything that she said. Well, while he thought that they were joking, Linds was taking it all very seriously, thinking that he liked her back. THAT'S when she sent me the email asking me for advice on how to get her and Jeremy together.



Here's my response to her email:



"AUGH I'm no good at advice ... umm ... I guess it all comes down to who he likes more ... like, who he's closer to. I think that it would be wrong of Cathy to date the dude without asking Betty about it first ... that could ruin their friendship. I like to resolve things without a fight, or a ruined relationship, you know what I'm saying? Lol luvv ya!"

So then I waited for her response. Obviously, with her state of mind at the moment, she was NOT happy when I said what I said back to her, and here is her response:

"whatever. it doesn't matter anymore.
really. it doesn't.
at all
none whatsoever
so forget it
forget i ever said anything
because none of it mattered
.. ever"

So, as you can probably guess, I'm like "What the heckskey??" over here!

*__*__*__*

So the next morning was when we IMed, she was really cold towards me. I asked her how things worked out, and she was all like "didn't you read my reply? it doesnt matter anymore. FOR. GET. IT."
I was crushed.
But I was even more crushed when I figured out the whole shebang. I called Jeremy and we sorted it out ... although we promised not to tell Lindsay about it, and that's the way it was meant to be. ...

*__~__~__~__*

Have you ever been low?
Have you ever had a friend that let you down so?
When the truth came out
Were you the last to know?
Were you left out in the cold?
Cuz what you did was low. . . .

~~~**~~~**~~~

God, I hope that everything will be alright between me, Linds, and Jeremy . . .

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!
~ Megan
<333

The Older I Get

Btw, the title is a song title by a band called Skillet. If you haven't heard it, then find it!!!! It's an amazing song!!!

Mmkay ........... I am really confusing. I'm not even kidding. But it seems like the more time I spend hanging out with Jeremy, the more I like him back ....................... AH!

I can't believe this, but I found out something the other day ............

Sam is a jerk.

Well, not ENTIRELY, but he has abosloutely NO SUPPORT for me whatsoever .... it's like we're not even friends! Last Wednesday night, he brought his cousin to church, and he completely ignored me ... like I didn't exist! Instead he and his cousin hung out the entire time ... heck, he even said more to Ashlee than he did to me .... yepp, he's got it BAD.

I'm just praying that God opens his eyes and lets him know that I'm not going to want to be associated with someone who I am only convenient for when there's no one better around. This could escalate; he has a crush on me, we start dating, and then suddenly he breaks up with me because he's found someone better ..... nu-uh, there is NO WAY that I, Megan Brittany mylastname-DiNolfi-EXsam'slastname-Musso shall put up with THAT!

That felt good.

Boo-yah.


PEACE OUT Y'ALL!!!
-- Megan
XoXo

Megan Is Crying Hysterically This Very Moment ...

My mom got some sort of order against my dad, and now he has to move out of the house for two weeks. It is SO DANG confusing, but I don't want him in my life, but, at the same time, I didn't want this. He is not allowed to contact us in any way, he is not allowed near the house or even Chick-Fil-A if my mom and/or Renee is working there at the moment, and he is not allowed to see or speak to us. He is staying with our Uncle Wayne (pastor of PGCC), and he is apparently (or from what I've heard) very upset and angry with himself. I am praying that God shows him what he has done to his family, and that He will lead my dad to get some form of help. But in the meantime, all of this ......... his birthday is June 1st, and we aren't allowed to talk to him ....... this is just too much. -- Megan

Why Can't Weeeeee Be Friends??????

Grrrr .... Jeremy told me he loves me just now ..........

WHY

CAN'T

WE

JUST

BE

FRIENDS?!?!?!?!?!?!

Oh well.

:p


HUGZ!
-- Megan

Sunday Night MADNESS!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I suppose that the title doesn't do it justice ... Sunday night was SPECTACULAR!!! I haven't been able to post on my blog in a while due to STRESS and CRUD in my life right now ...

I had thought that it was going to be a disaster ... a HUGE disaster. But it turns out that it went GREAT! Jeremy actually acted like a normal friend and not someone who is obssessed with me ... WOOT! Sam showed up for Sunday Night Bible Study for the first time in three months ... WOOT WOOT! AND my girlfriends Lindsay, Rachel, and Linds' friend Jasmine completely had my back in the rough parts.

All in all, it was well worth all the worrying I did .... :D

One thing though: Sam was UBER jealous. I don't want him to be ... why can't we all be friends without the crush factor?! Oh well, I can deal with that ;)

I'll post more later ... gotta get ready for church!!

LOVE YA

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!
-- Megan

It R B Brokeded!

Yepp ... I broke my finger.





I was behind my bedroom door, looking for something, with my hand on the door. While I was chewing my minty fresh gum, Hannah began to open my door a bit. So I tried to tell her to "HANNAH NOOOOO!" while removing my hand from the door. Then she burst the door open, cracking my pinkie completely backwards in the process.



Yeah. Ow.



But it's somewhat better now. I can type pretty well ... (although I've been correcting typos here and there).



Linds emailed me today and asked me to call her. So I did.



Twice.



Well, I left a message, anyways. I hope that she's okay ...



Cleaning just ended at 830. I still wish that I would have been there, but I wasn't, so that's okay. It's not that big a deal ... I just didn't want three people to have to clean the entire lower level of church by themselves. Oh well.

I tried calling the church phone too ..... what?! I'm bored out of my mind here!!!!

Well, have a great night all!! Don't break any fingers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

-- Megan

Pizza Time!

LOL I'm making pizza for dinner ...

Today was BORING ... no church cleaning ... no friends to hang with ... no fun times ... sigh ...

Jeremy emailed me today. He greeted me by saying "hey there beautiful" ... what does he see in me, anyways? Maybe it's because I am me, so I don't see myself the same way everyone else does. I hope that's the case, because I don't feel as good about myself as everyone thinks I should.

Today it's one year till my cousin Nichole's wedding ... I am SO psyched for her! Renee is going to be in it ... I'm going to have to road trip with her several times to PA next year ... I'm just praying that this goes better for her than prom did ... she went with Tony (remember him?) and he's a big huge jerkface. I would tackle him myself, but One: I'm not that kind of person. I'd rather settle things with words, not punches, and Two: He'd probably beat the crap out of me.

Haha. So much for that. ;)

I found out today just how much I'm going to miss it at my church. My mom is ready to leave it, for numerous reasons. What are they?
1: No one has her back through what we're going through ... they all think that my mom should just tough it out and deal with my dad's abuse. Which is stupid, because it's not like they know what it's like to dread their mom going to work, because they know that in that time, their dad is going to scream in their face for something stupid like leaving the tea sit on the counter to answer the phone.
2: This is where Renee's whole "Romeo and Juliet" thing comes to life ... Sam's dad is the Youth Leader at our church. He's cool for the most part, but any more, it's like he doesn't like teaching us or leading us to God as much as he did when Renee first came to the Seekers. My mom confided in him one day about what was going on in our family. And ever since, Renee and Sara have had problems, and Hannah and Kristin (Sam's little sister) have had more and more arguments. Sometimes it seems as if me and Sam are the only two who want to hold the Sam'slastname-Mylastname connection together. There have been some MAJOR problems between my mom and his dad ever since. He is the one who thinks that we should just deal with it and get over it. And now that my mom's getting a separation ... and then divorce ... well, they might as well just pick us up one day and throw us out the front doors.

That leads me to my wierd vision thing ... me and my mom and sisters, halfway out the front doors of church. All the people who want us out of church are pulling us one way (out the doors), and the few people who give a crap about us in our church on the other side, trying to pull us back in, like a nasty game of Tug-O-War. I've always imagined that.

I just made the pizza. It smells SO GOOD ... but somehow, I'm not all that hungry. My mom says that if I'm not careful, I'll get annorexia. I currently weigh 83 lbs., and I have no desire to shrivel up like last year's Easter lillies and die ... so I am going to STUFF MAH FACE NO MATTER HOW I FEEL!!!!

Hahaha ....

I took the first one out of the oven, and there was this STINKIN HUGE bubble in the middle of it ...

So what did I do?

Smacked it with a spoon and yelled "DIE EVIL BUBBLE!!!!"

Yeppppp, that be how I roll.

;)

My mom told me this afternoon before she went to work that Sunday she's going to try to take me, Renee, and Hannah to see Prince Caspian in theaters. I can't wait, I LOVE the Narnia series!

God bless, have an awesome night!!!

-- Megan

The Most Unproductive Meeting EVER ...

Yeah, the title says it all. It started out with our VBS director explaining stuff to us that I had already known from past experience. And then we moved from the Sanctuary to the Fellowship Hall downstairs, and everyone was given a job to do ... except for the guides. So me and all the other guides who had shown up (Me(gan), Sam, Renee, Sara, Rachel (of W-ness), Alysia, and Ashlee) sat and did virtually nothing for 30 minutes. Then we headed outside to the pavillion (yeah. It's that cool. ;) and just hung out. Eventually Alysia and Ashlee left (no big loss there ... Lord forgive me for that one ...) as well as Rachel (big loss there ...) and Sara and Renee began to walk around the church and talk about random stuff, like teens in the Youth Group (we're the Seekers!!) do when they want to talk.

So I spent most of the meeting time hanging out with Sam at the pavillion. Which, to me, isn't so bad, considering we spent half the time laughing about stuff. That's the way we are ... we make each other laugh.

Tomorrow night is church cleaning, and then afterwards, some video games and snackage. I want to go SO BAD, but I don't think I have a ride (again with the whole we-live-30-minutes-from-church-and-friends thing ...) so I probably won't be there. Which stinks, because Sam, Sara, Tony (another dude in the Seekers ... he's Ashlee and Alysia's older brother.) and I were going to split into teams of two (Sara and Tony v.s. me and Sam) and play Super Smash Brothers for the time that we are there ... dang ...

Tomorrow night I will be spending the night at one of my friends' house (no, not Sam ...), so I probably won't blog until Monday ... only because there's this concert thing Sunday afternoon at Busch Gardens that I'm hoping to go to. Sam has already offered me a ride there with his dad and Sara, but I don't know if I'll be allowed to go or not ... DANG ... And with this kickball party for Sunday night class and all Sunday night, yeah, I won't be blogging until Monday, but I'll give an update of everything ASAP.

EEEK! AN ANT CRAWLING UP MY ARM!!!

Sorry bout that ... yeah, I'm into blogging REALLY current events lol.

So, until Monday ...

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!
-- Megan

p.s. - I might start a weekly thing called "Megan's Songbook" where I start posting all my songs on this blog, rather than creating an entirely new one, so look out for that!

Meggy wrote a song todayyyyyyyy!!!!

LOL here it beeee ...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I Am

Yeah, yeah

You’re with me/ In my mind/ Goin’ crazy/ All the time/ I see you/ You see me/ Gettin’ cooler/ Shaking like a leaf/ I don’t wanna change/ You say stay the same//

You see me as I am/ You are my best friend/ And that’ll never change/ You take me as I come/ You’re not the only one/ But it feels that way/

Forget the lies/ They’re saying/ I despise/ The games they’re playing/ You see me/ I see you/ There’s nothing/ They can do/ They don’t see me like you do/ You do/ Always stay the same/ Always stay you/ OH!//

You see me as I am/ You are my best friend/ And that’ll never change/ Oh/ You take me as I come/ You’re not the only one/ But it feels that way/

I’m always waiting for you/ Are you waiting for me too?/ Oh!/ There’s nothing they can do/ I’m always waiting around for you/ For you/ OH!/

You see me as I am/ As I am/ As I am//

Yeah, yeah!

You see me as I am/ You are my best friend/ And that’ll never change/ Oh/ You take me as I come/ You’re not the only one/ But it feels that way/ Yeah yeah yeah/ You (you see me) see me as I am/ You are (you are my best friend) my best friend/ That’ll never ever ever ever change!/ You (you get me) get me like a dream/ It’s (it’s not always a dream) not always a dream/ But it feels that way/ Yeah yeah yeah//

yeeahahhh I lurve it!

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!
-- Megan (is having a strangely good day today!!)

SOMEONE SAVE ME!!!

I'd like to start this post by thanking speed racer rocks(ali), who left a comment for my blog ..... THANK YOU!!!! *gives hug ... well, as best as I can through the Internet, anyways .... *

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Today was .... well ..... I think you'd be able to tell by looking at the title for this ... yepp ....

I guess I should start out with the basics ... introducing you to my best friend in the world, Sam, a bit better. First off, he's CRAZY. He has a sense of humor that makes you smile no matter what, and he's got this smile that's not only infectious ... it blows you away. (Well, at least that's what it does to me .............) I met him 4 years ago, and we've been pretty much inseperable ever since. I love being his friend, and he feels the same way. But there's more to it, as there always is ...

We both have insanely huge crushes on each other. The only problem is that while I actually say something about it, Sam preffers to keep his feelings to himself. But that's okay, cause I am 100% satisfied with just being his friend.

Renee says we're like Romeo and Juliet. You know how it goes ... the parents can't stand each other (my mom and his dad), and we simply adore one another. I just hope that the ending is different for us .......... eeek ........

But here's the complication. There's this other guy, who is now another friend of mine. His name is Jeremy, and we met a year ago at Homeschooling Teen Game Night. I had given my email address to a girl there, and he was sitting there when I told her. So when I checked my email the next morning, lo and behold, there was an email from someone I didn't know (actually, from Jeremy), saying that he has had a crush on me ever since we met last year.

Now, I know what you're thinking. And even though I don't REALLY know, I'm going to guess anyways. "Aww, that's so sweet!" But see, I just want to be his friend. And not because of the whole Sam thing either ... there's complications with everything, I swear!! And besides, he's had a whole year to build up his feelings for me. And I've only known him for about 4 weeks. It's not wrong of me to say that I don't like him like that yet, is it?

Wednesday nights at 7, there is Bible study at my church. The next time that I saw Sam after the email was the Wednesday night before he and his family left for Arizona for two weeks. Arizona. THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COUNTRY. So I told him about the email I had recieved from Jeremy. He was okay, but one thing that I've noticed about Sam is that when he gets nervous, he shuffles his feet a lot. So as I was telling him, he was doing that very thing. I had wondered what that meant, but I guess I didn't put that much thought into it.

So about half a week earlier than I had thought, Sam and his family returned home. And the following Sunday, he told me that he missed me. Btw, that's not a common thing for Sam. He really keeps to himself, especially about me. So why did he tell me then that he missed me?

The truth is that ever since I told him about Jeremy, he's been acting ... wierd. Like, he'll say stuff to me that he's never said before. I don't understand that completely, but some days I honestly believe that Sam has seen the light ...

Tonight, however, I caved. I can't take the pressure that I'm feeling from Jeremy. He and I will be emailing back and forth, and then all of a sudden, he'll ask me if I've been thinking about dating.

Or us.

Or us dating.

And I finally have had enough of it. I just want to be his friend, for goodness sake! And it's not because of my crush on Sam either. I'll explain it in three words:

I'm not alright.

My parents are getting a separation soon. My mom is going to see a lawyer about it at the end of next week.

I guess that it's been going on forever, but what I never knew until about a month ago was that my mom actually had to pack up and take me and Renee away from my dad because he got so out of control. I was one then, so I don't remember that. But I do remember everything from then on ... my dad accusing my mom of cheating on him ... my dad screaming curse words in her face ... my dad nearly smacking me when I refused to tell him where my mom was going for counceling.

Last Sunday was Mother's Day. (Duh ...) I hope that yours was great! So now I should probably tell you about mine ...

It was okay. Got to go to church in the morning, go to lunch with my mom and sisters (my dad doesn't go to church anymore) afterwards, got to play Apples To Apples with Renee, Hannah, my mom, and Renee's friend Olivia that night at a teeny-tiny party at church, got to go home and hear my mom be screamed at from 9:30 to 11:00 pm ...

Well, that night, I sinned. (God forgive me for being so sneaky!!!) I recorded almost their entire fight on my cell phone. I even snuck downstairs into their sitting room (the bedroom is just beyond that room ... they were in there, and the door was closed) and stashed my cell in a pile of clothes and hit "record". Why did I do that?

Cause my dad fights dirty. His whole purpose in life is to break my mom, for whatever reason. I am praying for him, because he has become so cruel and so black-hearted. So, in order to fight back, I've been gathering evidence of his terror inside our house. Anything I find, I try to use it. I believe with my whole heart that he is the one cheating on my mom. He's trying to cover what he is doing by blaming my mom for everything that he is.

What does all of this have to do with my terribly confusing love life? The fact that last night, I had a talk with my mom on the way back from church (we live 30 minutes from it) about how I'm feeling the pressure from Jeremy. She understood, and finally got me to spill the utmost core of my boy troubles. I'm afraid that I'll make the same mistake that she did, thus, I am afraid to really let myself fall for anyone. I don't want to ... heck, I'm only 14. But the truth is that I'm so afraid of ending up with what my mom is dealing with today, that I have forgotten what it's like to just relax, and have fun, as teens should. She told me that I have to make it very clear to Jeremy of what I'm going through, and that I have to tell him to either lay off a bit, or he's going to lose me. And that's true ... I feel more and more compelled to just end our short-lived friendship every time I talk to him.

I have wondered where my dad is going to end up. And not just after the divorce ... has he lost his faith and salvation? Will he reclaim it before it's too late? I still love him ... even if he doesn't love me anymore. I just don't understand one thing ... what is it about me and my mom and sisters that is so unloveable that my dad felt he had to go and find someone else?

I do not understand much. But what I do know is that I am in the middle of many attacks from the Enemy now ... and I am not alone. I'm never alone. I know that there are many people in the world who are going through the same emotions that I am at the moment ... this very second. And right now, if you are one of those people, I want you to feel loved for one moment, because I am praying for you, and you should know that God loves you every day of your life. No matter how hard it is, it's not too hard for God. Nothing is impossible with Him. He'll get us all through this, and in the end, we will be victorious.

At least there's something to smile about right there.

Tonight is the first VBS (Vacation Bible School) meeting at my church. It's at 7:30 ... probably runs to about 9. I'm a teen guide, meaning that I will be paired with a partner and we will be in charge of an age group of kids for VBS week. One of my friends Alysia told me that I am either paired with Sam or his older sister Sara. Which is great, cause I get along just fine with the both of them. I will try to update the blog tonight when I get home, but if not, then I will be sure to post tomorrow. Hmm ... I wonder how dear Sammy will be tonight .... that reminds me .... I need to pray for him. Lately he's been down about something, and whenever I ask him, he says he's tired. I don't believe that at all. But I guess that he's only going to tell me if he really wants to, which is fine by me. I just hope that it's not because of me .......

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!
-- Megan

This Is Me ... 5/13/08

Life is full of drama. If you ask me, there's WAYYY too much of it. So, to help me keep some sanity in my life by venting, I created this blog as a kind of online journal. I don't care who reads it. In all actuality, it doesn't matter if no one reads this. But I always thought that doing an online journal would be really cool, so, here I am!!
I am going to start off by saying one great big "HEY!" to anyone who reads this. Thanks for visiting my blog! And also, I want to share a bit about myself ...
My name is Megan. For safety reasons, I am not going to put in any personably identifiable information, such as my last name. My birthday is December 21st, and this year I will FINALLY be 15 ... I can't wait for this birthday in particular, because I can then start working at the local Chick-Fil-A. My mom is a manager there, and my older sister is employed there too.
I should start out with the most important fact for me ... I am a devout Christian girl. I am sorry if you have a problem with that, but that's the way that I am. I am not offended by any other religions. I just believe what I believe.
I'm the middle girl. Most people say that that's the worst place to be. But for me, it's absolutely perfect. (On most days anyways ...) My older sister Renee is 17 years old, and my younger sister Hannah is 9. We're REAL close, which is a surprise for most people, who don't really get along with their siblings. I think it's because we love each other too much, that, when we fight, we can't stay away for very long. I believe that if people would just take the time to sit and at least talk out the problem they have with the person they have a problem with, it could change a lot. People would have a better understanding of each other then, and it would save us a lot of stress and tears.
I love my life sometimes. Other times, I wish that I didn't exist. This day is the day that I half love my life, half hate it. But one thing that I can say about life is that no matter what, you always have something to smile about. I've been trying to convince myself of that for years, and believe me, it's worked!
I know everyone says this, but I have the best friends in the world. I suppose that I should tell you their names so that you don't get confused in later posts ... there's Sam (as in Samuel, not Samantha), Lindsay, Rachel (W), other Rachel (C), Jeremy, and Michael. They're all UBER COOL, and I love them to death.
Hmm .... what else .... ahh yess! I am a writer ... I write novels, songs, and poetry. If there's one thing that never fails to make me feel better, it's reading a good book, or listening to a really great song, or reading some relaxing poetry. And if there's one thing that I feel is the very outer core (God being the actual core) of my world, it's music. My dream is to become a singer someday ... once I turn 16 and start driving (and once I get good at it of course!!) I'll start really putting myself out there for singing. I am currently learning to play guitar, and I play piano pretty well. I am praying that someday I'll be successful, go to Hollywood maybe, record a CD ... and meet my absolute favorite star, Mitchel Musso. Hehehe ...
You probably wouldn't be able to tell from this post in particular, but I'm pretty random! Renee says that I'm in the family comedy business, and I've been in it for 14 years now. I like the fact that I can keep people laughing, even when they don't want to laugh, which is very often.
But it's not always fun and games here. I live in Virginia ... me and my family relocated from Pennsylvania about 4 years ago. It feels like forever though. And as much as I love it here, sometimes I even get homesick. And trust me on this one, I HATED living in PA ... a place where everyone knew your name, but no one wanted to actually KNOW you.
My Sunday Night Bible Study teacher is currently teaching us about how we were created with the longing for a close, personal relationship with others. We want people to know us and to understand us more than anything. When someone comes into our lives and wants to really know us, it's called a "two-way street" ... as well as that person meeting you there, you've gotta meet them too. Growing up, I had no two-way street. In fact, I had what I like to call a road block. I lived deprived of a more than fine relationship until we moved to VA.
But even at that, some things never change, as, in time, you will see ...
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Right now my mom and Renee are at a funeral for a girl that Renee knew. I had never met her before, and yet, I'm so sad for her family. I guess that's what happens when you care about more than yourself.
Today hasn't been so bad. I mean, it would be better had Hannah not pulled some stuff on me this afternoon ... I mean, maybe it's mean of me to say, but what actually gives her the right to go snooping through my journals and stuff anyways?? I think that's part of the reason why I made this blog ... this is one journal she might never get to read. That's the beauty of it ... I can literally say anything I'm feeling without the guilt that usually follows!
It's MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGICAL!!!!

Hannah just came in and told me that she fell of her bike. Nothing serious, just a couple scrapes. Those don't faze her ... Hannah's one tough cookie. Unlike me ... I cry when I get a papercut (What?!?! They hurt a lot!!! ;). She's been falling a lot lately ... hmm I'd better pray for her.

Well, I suppose that wraps up my first post ... boring, I know ... but trust me on this one, it will get ... uh ... better isn't the right word .........

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!
-- Megan