Dang.

HOW.
CAN.
ANYONE.
BE.
SO.
HEARTLESS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I don't even know. I mean, he tries to screw up my mom, and she's fighting back. He tries to break down my older sister, and she's doing the same as my mom. He goes after me, and SCREWS UP MY CHANCES WITH JEREMY!!!!!

Grr.

ROAR.

ROOOOOOOOAAAARRR!!!!!!!!

And the worst part? He's not only my best friend's dad, but the Youth Leader at the church we go to! Now he's just screwing with my head ... he doesn't like me and Jeremy being together, because he doesn't believe in us dating so young (it's not like that's any of his business anyways!!), so he goes and sabatoges that, and is now pushing me and his son (my dear BFF Sam) together. (After all I'm doing to hold our friendship together because he's jealous. It's fragile enough already without anyone's "help"!) But he's already made it VERY clear that he will die before he sees me and Sam become anything more than friends, so pretty soon he's gonna try to push me and Jeremy back together.

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOMEONE STOP THE MADNESS!!!!!! =O

And all this time I've been so CLUELESS as to all this ... I only figured it out two days ago.

Completely oblivious.

Dang.

That SO explains SO MUCH: The weird, distant way Jeremy's been acting, the same weird way that Sam's been acting, how Jeremy told me in our last conversation that "I have nothing to worry about" and that "he still loves me the same he always has, and that he always will", and Sam's advice, including "trust me on this one, Megan ... you didn't do anything wrong".

Oh. My. Gosh. Why can't people just mind their own business? I can't believe that we all still call it a church ... it's full of nothing but hearts broken, minds bended, and spirits crushed from gossip, lies, and betrayal.

And that's the honest to goodness truth. There's nothing left to be desired there. I can't believe that we're STILL there!

My mom told me, Nay, and Han that she is prepared to leave. I think that this is good timing too, because we just recently visited Jeremy's dad's church, and I think that's where we'll go once we leave. That makes me SO HAPPY!!! I've seen Jeremy three times already this week ... I hope and pray that this keeps up ... I love seeing his face light up whenever he sees me. It makes me remember the Jeremy I knew before this new, depressed Jeremy ... the one I fell in love with.

But something strange about PGCC is that I have found is that I am making friends with people that I never got along with before. And I feel like the ones that I have gotten along with are at risk of getting yanked away from me. And after last night at church ...

I don't know. I just have a really bad feeling.

~ Meggy-Boo
(who, in the midst of this, is still smiling!!! =D)