clean slate

www.historyissoyesterday.blogspot.com

I would give my iPod up for you.

Nate schmate.

I like being single. :p

But anyways, I am dedicating this post to the girls of my LHGH Sunday night class . . . I FREAKING LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!! If you ever get to read this, I can honestly say that I would give up my iPod for you. As you all know how musical I am, you probably know that's a biiig deal haha (;

love you love you love you love you love you love you love you LOVE YOUUU!!

MeGaN

My favorite jacket smells like Nate.. and I don't really mind.

Oh boy, me and the code names.

So yesterday was declared Megan Day, because it was so wonderful! (: First off, I had my vocal lesson at 7, and that went spectacularly . . . my vocal teacher is going to help me record my Gran's favorite hymn for her (long story, I'll explain later).

And then I went shopping with my sisters, to WalMart, and then Target.

BOOM >>> surprise numero dos. (;

I ran into "Nate", a friend of mine who I haven't seen since Summer Camp at my church last summer. It was really really nice seeing him again . . . I mean, REALLY nice. You know when you think about someone often who you haven't seen in forever, and then there's that serendipitous moment when you actually DO see them, and you're all "OMIGOSH, I missed you!!", but you don't really realize it until after the fact?

That about describes Nate.

And the title is sort of funny, but it came from riiight here ---> <3.

I hope that it's not that long till I see him again. And who can blame me? Cause the truth is . . .

. . . he still makes me wish I had said or done something to keep him around longer. I guess that makes him my boy of summer.

Oh GEEZ.

There's no hope for me.

M

"Alex"

Have you ever wanted beyond anything you can explain to say something to someone? What if that someone was a person you had never formally met before? And what if you'd give anything to save that person?

That's how I feel about "Alex".

I have no idea why I feel that way about him. I just feel this desperateness when I think of the state of his soul. People like him don't deserve Hell ... they just DON'T. People like him need a chance to save themselves from a terrible, cruel fate. It's frustrating, though, to see him, know where he is headed, and not be able to do anything about it. It keeps me awake at night. Literally. I am up praying and crying out for him nearly every night. I have NEVER been this desperately hopeful for a person's salvation before. It's weird. I feel like I'm missing something, like there's a good reason for this insanity I'm putting myself through. Does any of this make sense? It doesn't really make any to me.

I've written songs. I've cried. I've prayed.
Now it's your turn, Alex.
Please don't neglect what's chasing after you every day. It DOES affect you. It SHOULD affect you. And there's no one and nothing that can get in between you and God ... so don't be afraid. I think I get it a bit ... there's a lot of people who would be disappointed in you. Like, for example, everyone who supports what you believe in now so firmly. A family tree doesn't make you who you are. Anyone could get past that. And what a victory that would truly be!

Help me out. Don't give up. And you'll probably never read this, but I love you like I already know you. And if you don't ever give up, or give in, and never surrender, then someday, I WILL get to meet you.

I'll never stop praying for you.

I love you,

M

Like Sherlock & Watson

So tomorrow I might be going to see Sherlock Holmes with Sam and some other people. I'm hoping beyond hope that I'll be allowed to go!! Things aren't looking so good so far, but I'm still holding onto hope.

Am I crazy for missing him so much? I don't know.. sometimes I feel like I should just let go for a while. Then again, I've tried that, and.. well.. you've seen just how well THAT worked. :P

The thing is that I believe we're just as close as we've always been. Mere time shouldn't have changed that, right? We were always friends. ALWAYS. That's what it feels like at least. I mean, on Monday he turns 16, and it feels like just yesterday we were turning 12. That somewhat floors me. We've known each other since we were 10. That just seems pretty awesome to me.

It's not like I wouldn't care as much if I didn't have feelings for him either. (I've never really known what it's like to not have feelings for him, but you get the picture ;]). We're just.. something. I can feel it. Best friends no matter WHAT. We're like Lucy and Mr. Tumnus. Like Bella and Jacob.

Like Sherlock and Watson. ;]

M

''I keep running into trees!''

So for Christmas we received a Wii, along with Animal Crossing: City Folk. Which, by the by, is AMAZING. :] Hannah and I have been playing the version for DS for about a year, so we know EVERYTHING, and Renee and my mom have absolutely no idea what they're doing. It's hysterical! Renee keeps trampling all my pretty flowers, and my mom keeps running into trees. (Hence the post title :]). She is like a tween when she's playing. It's both entertaining.. and a little frightening. Haha. She has managed to destroy three patches of flowers (OK compared to Renee's five, the stinker), buy a house near the beach, and befriend a pink dog named Cookie.

Mmhmm. She's lost it, folks. XD

Renee keeps calling me a ''closet blonde'', cause the highlights I got over the summer are coming through the dark brown, reddish brown and black (yes, my hair is like 6 different colors right now XD), so now it's turning gold in some places.

My mom still calls me Meggie.

Hannah calls me Renesmee.

Renee calls me a blonde.

I think I like Renesmee better. ;P

M

In my 15th year of life ...

I'm not going to start this out by saying ''OMIGOSH this is gonna be the best year ever!''. No sense in jinxing it ;]. I'll just have to make the best of whatever this year throws my way.

So. 2010. WOW.

As I sit here and think back on the previous 365 days, I realize that I tend to dwell on the negative. Which is out-of-character for me, being the optimist that I normally am. My mind takes me to all the places I wouldn't normally go, like Renee's graduation or March. I'll be honest: March was one of the worst months of my life.

But then I realize that though 2009 certainly wasn't my favorite year, it was most definitely one of the most important. I learned things in 2009 that I believe will help me in the future. Sure, it took a lot of tears and heartache, but anything that's worth anything is a fight.

And it's worth fighting for.

Happy 2010 everybody!

M